I believe in Jesus because of what He has already done for me. I believe in Jesus because I believe in a Heaven and a Hell. I believe in Jesus because He has given me life and a purpose.
I don't believe in Jesus because He will always give me and my family good health. I don't believe in Jesus because He will give me monetary riches.
I love Him simply because He loved me.
There have been times I have doubted, yes. But I am always drawn back to Him because of the truth of who He is, and His constant presence in my life.
When we couldn't have kids - I doubted.
Now we have four.
When Dave got sick - I doubted.
But he's ok now, and we are reminded continuously that are strength and trust need not be on Dave but on God.
When Will was born - I doubted.
But Will survived, and is a rambunctious 1.5 year old.
God remained faithful.
Recently a woman who I look up to immensely had a tire fly off her car while she was driving down the freeway at 70mph in Atlanta, GA. She was fine. No accident. And she posted on good ol' Facebook that God protected her that day.
Yes, I agree, He did.
But someone made a comment that irked me. She said, "God is faithful to the faithful." See, that bothered me.
God is faithful to the faithful, but God's faithful isn't the same as our faithful. Nowhere in the Bible did God EVER say that, "Whosoever believes in me shall not suffer death, calamity, illness, sadness, money problems. the same trials the rest of the world does." He did however say, "Whosoever believes in me shall not perish but have everlasting life."
If I am faithful to my God, even in my times of unfaithfulness (that I experience daily), because I believe in Him, He will be faithful to His word, and I will go to Heaven.
I may enter Heaven broke, heart broken, and without any limbs - but God will still prove faithful.
God is ALWAYS faithful.
Today, Dave lost his job. And I could spend quite some time spewing on and on about the injustice of it all. But there is no point - we will hold our heads up high and move onward and upward.
Dave is confident, and so am I. I am nervous as I imagine any wife would be, but I am brought back to the truth that God has hammered into my life - He is ALWAYS faithful. He will provide for our needs - in might not be always in the way we think He ought, but it's always in the way He knows it should.
I am reminded of when Dave got sick. Shortly before that day in February three years ago, I studied James 1 with my friend. After Dave got sick, I was so angry at God that I didn't read the bible for a LONG time - because apparently that was showing Him for giving me trials. But the word proved true, as I know it will again:
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
See, even though people have let us down again, as people will always do, God will remain faithful - because that's what He does.
And, I will be way mature by the end of it all.